Sermon Discussion Guide - Rule 5: Engage at Home with Purpose

Recap

Paul shows us that being “filled by the Spirit” isn’t just a private spiritual experience—it shows up in the closest relationships we have. Spirit-filled love changes the posture we bring into the room, the way we use power, and the atmosphere we create at home. Marriage and family life become a living picture of Jesus to the people closest to us.

Connect

• What’s one “everyday moment” at home (mornings, dinner, bedtime, car rides) that is most likely to run on autopilot for you?
• When you’re stressed or tired, what do you usually bring into the room—peace, pressure, criticism, silence, distraction, warmth?

Check-In

(Last week: Rule 4 — Engage with Intentionality)

• Where did you intentionally choose presence over autopilot this week (phone down, listening, initiating)? What happened?
• What’s one moment you drifted into “leftover love” (leftover patience/time/attention)? What do you think was underneath it?

Contemplate

• Read Ephesians 5:18–21; 5:25–30; 5:22–24, 33; 6:1–4 (CSB).
• In Ephesians 5:18, what is the command? What does Paul contrast it with, and why does that matter?
• In 5:19–21, what are the evidences that the Spirit is filling a person/community? (What does it produce?)
• How does 5:21 (“submitting to one another in the fear of Christ”) change the way we read everything that follows about marriage and parenting?
• In 5:25–30, what is the model for a husband’s love, and what do “provide” and “care” show you about the day-to-day shape of love?
• Additional passages:
• Deuteronomy 6:4–9

Consider

• If your home is “preaching,” what message has it been preaching lately about what Jesus is like?
• The sermon highlighted two drifts: passivity and domineering. Which one do you tend to fall into under stress, and what would repentance look like this week?
• In the next 24 hours, what is one concrete action you can take to “engage at home with purpose” (who, when, where, what)?
• What is one relationship at home where you need to “go back” (own it, apologize, and make it right)? What’s one sentence you need to say?

Cover

• Confess where autopilot, distraction, anger, passivity, or control has shaped the atmosphere of your home.
• Ask the Holy Spirit to fill you again—forming humility, gratitude, and mutual submission.
• Pray for marriages and families to reflect Jesus clearly, especially in hard or fragile seasons.

Practices

• Protect 10 minutes: choose one daily moment at home and guard it this week.
• Put the phone down: decide ahead of time where your phone will go during that moment.
• Ask two questions: “How are you really doing?” and “Is there anything I can do to serve you today?”